Those who know me – or have met me, or have read my blog – know that I love kayaking. It came as a total surprise to me when I first tried it; I'd thought for a long time it looked fun, but never thought I'd manage it due to my general lack of balance, coordination, fitness... However, a colleague invited me to come along with my Teen to the kayak club she was a member of, and we were immediately hooked! That was four and a half years ago now, and since then we've both been keen to get on the water at every opportunity.
The club we belong to is focussed on flatwater racing, but fortunately for me I didn't know when we first nervously went along just how good some of the club are - they have a few juniors who compete nationally and even internationally; had I known that I'd never have dared show my face there, let alone get into a kayak. But ignorance was bliss in this instance, and the club was so friendly, welcoming and supportive that by the time we discovered this, we were well and truly committed.
Although it's a racing club, that's actually entirely optional. Of course we're encouraged to enter races, but there's no pressure, and there are many of us in the bottom division who've never raced, or only done the one race hosted by our club annually. For us, it's chiefly about just getting out on the water, enjoying the peace of a Saturday morning on the river, seeing the wildlife (occasional kingfishers, regular herons, sometimes egrets and cormorants and, this past weekend - a muntjac deer!) and catching up with friends. Of course, building up stamina and working on our technique is an element, but the atmosphere is what keeps me going back.
Having had some counselling for my mental health last year, it became very clear that kayaking is actually a key activity for me; both the physical exertion and the outdoor-ness are important, and the mental boost I get from it far outweighs the physical exhaustion. Even last weekend, when the air temperature was about 5-6 degrees C, and the river not very different, when my body told me after the first couple of hundred metres upstream just how much it disagreed with this activity, when there was ice still clinging to some of the plants in sheltered areas along the river - even then, the exhileration of being back at the club, on the river, made it all absolutely worthwhile.
And of course, having paddled in January, when it's chilly and there's ice in places, that means that I have no excuse later in the year - when it's a grey and drizzly day in March, or a blustery April morning, I'll know that I can manage then since I could manage now. This time I went back a step, to a slightly more stable boat than I'd been using in the summer and autumn, but that felt absolutely safe and secure, so next time I might even go back to my nice hopefully-not-too-wobbly boat (which I haven't yet fallen out of..!). That's a decision to make on the day, looking at how calm or otherwise the river is!
So this will be the focus of the My Passion badge for me; here's hoping my health continues to let me paddle for the next six months! My aim for this year is to do the local Hasler race, plus one other. That will mean I've raced three times in the season, so will be eligible to enter the national event in September. I'll be a good solid last there, I'm sure, if I manage to get there - but that's OK; I'm not racing other people, just myself, my doubts and insecurities, and of course my cancer.
And between now and then, I'll obviously make sure that any holidays involve some sort of paddling if possible - canoe, leisure kayaks, whatever, just so long as I get to be on the water wherever we are!
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